RAGE

I am not talking about anger here - I am talking about red hot RAGE. When you see the stars in your eyes and you world goes blank and it feels like your body is going to explode. When I was younger I had a lot of problems with range and it created a lot of problems for me. Once I got clean and sober I found a place of serenity within me and the RAGE just seemed to go away. The sad truth is it has come back - I have lost that center. The other day I hit that spot and just didn't know what to do with myself. I thought about using, cutting myself but ended up just punching some walls - which IS NOT a healthy way of dealing with it. I have to learn how to communicate how I am feeling without feeling like I am losing control. Sometimes I just do not know how to express myself with words and that is when the RAGE starts to creep in. I know that I am the one that has the power to control my anger and RAGE. RAGE is something that is so insidious and can destroy people, relationships and jobs. I think the key for me is being aware of how I am feeling and being able to express myself when I am upset. It does not help to take the feelings out on myself or anyone else. I have to learn to communicate my feelings especially the ones that are tough for me like anger and frustration. Communication is the key to so many things and I feel that if we just learned to tell people how we are feeling and what our needs are then there is no need to feel out of control. My challenge for you today is to identify how you are feeling and communicate your needs to at least one person.